


Me Oh My

by sskkyyrraa



Series: Twins Week 2k18 [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Childhood, Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 17:24:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13506282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sskkyyrraa/pseuds/sskkyyrraa
Summary: “I assume you realize this kind of idiocy will not be tolerated here.”“Is there another type of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?”Day one of Twins Week! Was supposed to pick a favorite twin but I've never been good at choosing.





	Me Oh My

 

Lup runs down the hall, barely glancing behind her. Her heart pounds in her throat, beating faster than her feet. Behind her, she can hear the loud snuffling of the boar chasing her. She rounds a corner, shoes squeaking on the tile. She almost falls but she pushes forward with her finger tips. Ahead of her, Taako is laughing wildly, his long hair slipping out of the bright purple scrunchie. People, kids and teachers, poke their heads out of classroom doors. Lup waves for them to get back, get back for real! They see the boar, scream, and slam the doors shut. Taako skids to a stop and Lup narrowly stops herself from barreling straight into him. They’re breathing heavily, but the boar seems to be gone. Lup leans over, hands on her knees and so out of breath she might throw up. Taako is laughing still between gasps for breath.

“Where’d it go?” Lup manages to get out, standing up and looking around. There’s no one in sight. 

“I don’t know but we gotta get out of here before it comes back,” Taako says, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the stairs. The jog down the stairs, as quiet as they can manage. Crouching by the door, she peeks around the corner. She swears and swings back behind the door.

“Teachers,” she mouths. Taako nods and starts to creep back up the stairs. They’re halfway up when something falls out of his pocket. Coins drop and echo in the stairwell. They both curse out loud, high and panicked. Lup runs down to collect them while Taako runs back upstairs. He leans over the railing, silently urging her to hurry. She gathers them, shoving them into her own pockets.

“Lulu!” Taako cries out but it’s too late. A meaty hand grabs her roughly by the collar of her shirt. She stares up in horror as Taako is met with the same fate. Mr. Bichel, the vice principal, has a firm grip on Taako’s arm. He struggles. “Let me go!”

Lup cranes her neck to see that she’s been caught by the principal, Mr. Damon. He glares down, his face red from the effort of chasing her down and also his own anger. She tries to smile and he just shakes his head. She sighs and lets herself be dragged to the office. 

  
  


“I assume you realize this kind of idiocy will not be tolerated here.”

“Is there another type of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?” Taako asks. Lup snorts, tries to cover it up with a cough. Taako grins, relaxing a bit.

“We can stick to potty humor if that’s more your speed,” Lup offers. “I think we still have some whoopie cushions from first grade.”

“No, no, he’s right. The boar was too much,” Taako says, serious. Lup nods solemnly. 

“Next time we’ll just do chickens!” Lup and Taako dissolve into giggles as they picture dozens of chickens loose in the school hallways. They turn to each other and start listing more and more ridiculous creatures for their next prank.

“Weasels!”

“Raccoons!”

“Rabbits!”

“Oh! Ponies!”

“Alpacas!”

“Llamas!”

“Llamas are just ugly alpacas.”

“That’s not true!”

“Yeah huh!”

“Nuh uh!”

“Yea-”

“Enough!” Mr. Damon yells, slamming his hands on his desk with a loud thud. It startles the twins out of their argument and they slowly turn back to look at him. His face is even redder than before, sweaty now and a vein is bulging. “I’ve had enough of you two! For months you’ve plagued this establishment with your awful pranks. I’ve tried, oh I  _ tried _ , to accommodate, to be patient, to  _ understand _ . But you’ve caused nothing but trouble and you refuse to listen to reason. This was a step too far. Someone could have gotten hurt. There has to be a line in the sand.”

Taako hunches his shoulders to his ears and sinks into his seat. Lup reaches for his hand, and squeezes. She bites at her bottom lip and looks away. They both know what’s coming.

“I’ve called your aunt. She’s on her way.”   
  


 

The walk home is silent with Auntie Maarg’s grip so tight it hurts. They come home to a small one story house on an acre of farmland. It is then and only then that she lets them go. They hover awkwardly in the entryway while Maarg, just as silently, starts pulling out pots and pans and bowls and food stuffs. Outside they can hear their uncle whistling. 

“I know it’s not easy for you two,” she says, beckoning them to the table. The two hesitate and then step forward. Not quite at the table yet, but closer. “When your mother, my sister, when she-- When I took you in, I made a promise to her. I said, ‘Maizie, I will love these children and I will give them the best life possible.’ But you two, well, you haven’t made it easy, have you?”

“Auntie Ma--” Lup starts but Maarg holds up a hand, stopping her. She sighs, heavy and soul weary. 

“You’re children and already you have been through more than some adults I know. You have restless, almost chaotic energy. I understand, your mother was the same. We’ll just have to harness it in a more productive, less damaging way.” Maarg pushes forward a cutting board with carrots on it. “We’ll make dinner together.”

“We’re not in trouble?” Lup asks suspiciously as she picks up a peeler. Maarg laughs, handing a large pot to Taako. He grunts under the weight of it.

“Of course you are. But we’ll discuss that later. For now, we have a soup to make. Koko, be a dear and fill this with water from the pump.”

He frowns but keeps his thoughts to himself and carries the pot out the door. Lup slowly starts to peel the carrot. She’s chopping them by the time Taako returns. He’s covered in water but he’s grinning. Lup returns his grin, helping him lift the pot onto the table. She chops and he throws them into the water. Maarg is whistling now as she prepares chicken at the counter. Taako tries to whistle but with his missing front tooth it’s just a pitchy noise. Lup and Maarg laugh, Taako throws the carrot butts at them, and there is a warmth in the room not just from the stove.

**Author's Note:**

> twins week is a week long celebration of lup and taako! you can find more on their tumblr twinsweek. you can find more of ME on tumblr too as lesbianwario.
> 
> thank you so much for reading! please leave a comment i do this for the validation


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